Up until that infamous afternoon, none of the members of the Stentnor Strand Ladies’ Dragon Wrestling Society had ever seen a dragon, let alone had chance to wrestle one. Their society’s name had always been . . . well, let’s just say socially metaphoric.

That was all about to change when Bob landed on the beach, looking for a nice place to catch a few rays, and if all went well, eat a virgin. Alas, the ladies of the SSLDWS were all too morally intemperate for Bob to get anything but indigestion.

Alltop enjoys wrestling… Photo via Twisted Vintage.

Isn’t that life? Some days you get the rare ground parrot and some days the rare ground parrot gets you.

Right in the neck.

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Stephen Fry is hilarious.

Alltop and humor-blogs.com tend to parrot one another.

Cute. Funny.

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Alltop and humor-blogs.com don’t know what it means either.

Delores always liked to take a few moments between shows and get a little alone time. Of late the circus had been touring in the Southwest and they’d seen lots of desert. Delores liked the desert. It reminded her of home, where she got her show-name from, Sahara Sally, which to tell you the truth she preferred to her given name, which rhymed with a female body part, and which the other kids at Sahara Hills High had teased her about relentlessly.

Of course THAT had been preferable to what she now heard thousands of times daily from the barker: “Check out Sahara Sally. Check her out. Ask to see her camel toe!

Alltop and humor-blogs.com are a couple of geeks. Photo via Foxtongue. “Delores” joke from Seinfeld, Episode 20, Season 4.

Dr. Fleshrender had been trying to learn ancient Egyptian mummification techniques for years, but he’d yet to master even the most basic principles.

First of all, he just wasn’t into all that yucky stuff with the internal organs and putting them in jars. Coptic (a feel, heh) or not.

Secondly, he found the mixture of soda ash, bicarbonate and household salt he was meant to bath his mummies in just unpleasant. Natron my ass, he’d mutter.

Thirdly, most of his volunteers did not want to have a red-hot poker shoved up their nose so he could remove their brains. (Though he was keen to try.)

He did enjoy the wrapping process though.

Alltop and humor-blogs.com are more into lycanthropes. Photo by Marcel Van Der Flug via Strange Ink.

It had been an off-hand comment. Passionate, but completely unrehearsed.

They’d just finished watching the opening show of the new Mad Men season, and Bob turned to his wife Janice, and said, “you know, I really don’t think you could improve upon this show. This really is the best thing on television right now. No scratch that. The best thing NEAR television. There’s no way you could make it any better. I mean, it’s historically accurate. It’s dramatic. God-damned it Janice, it’s just fucking exciting. It’s the best thing ever, I tell you!”

Grinding her teeth, Janice thought, “Wait ’till you get back from work tomorrow … I’ll show you exciting…”

Alltop and humor-blogs.com think Joan is hot. Photo via Strange Ink.

There was no doubt about it, Max’s favourite activity at Camp Oonaway was archery.

There was nothing more satisfying than getting help with his stance, finding the right way to draw, keeping one’s fingers firm, yet loose, while lowering the bow into position. The delicious twang and thwap as he released the shaft.

And don’t even get him started on how exciting it was to hit the bulls eye.

Alltop and humor-blogs.com both enjoy fletching. Photo via Retrozone.