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Archive | January, 2006

Sunday O-Rama!

By on January 22, 2006 in General Skwib

There’s a great Carnival of Insanity to check out this week at Dr. Sanity. One of the tidbits there (in addition to the green babies post) is a nice list of top 10 blogger lies. Am I a hypocrite for linking to a list, after posting this? Yes, yes I am.

The babies also made in the Modulator’s Friday Ark, which has added quite a bit of catblogging since Friday. Speaking of animal blogging, this BBC story about a hamster/snake friendship made me feeling somewhat disturbed, as though I’d just been sharing Dr. Tundra’s consciousness for a few seconds.

And speaking of a Dr. Tundra-like consciousness, the quote of the day has to go to this theatrical history prof:

“I thought to myself, ‘Let’s do a method-acting approach to the study of history and see how it works.’ I chose the Nazis because they were absolutely the most obnoxious, whacky group I could find.”

Yep, he managed to get everyone to hate him, Nazis, socialists, dog lovers, lefties, righties, cat fanciers, academics, nonacademics, and itinerant loofah salesmen. Story here, and his paper, Now It Can Be Told: Why I Pretended to be a Neo-Nazi, is pretty wild stuff, despite the fact that he mentions Jacques Derrida and Michele Foucault.

I read my blogroll (#6)

By on January 21, 2006 in But is it art?, General Skwib

Let’s start off with a little dinner, put on by the Reverend Billy Gisher. Enjoy his satire, which is so deep you need a course in spelunking to find it. That IS a compliment.

Now that you’re fortified, perhaps we can think about politics a little. If you’re Canadian, you’re probably thinking about how you’re going to cast your vote on Monday. Joe is thinking Green. Cool. I’ve already decided to vote for them because “I am socially progressive, fiscally responsible, and committed to environmental sustainability – just like the Green Party.” There’s nine other reasons too.

Leslie found this quote, which makes me worry about my friends to the South. What is going on? I thought it was Canada that had too much government.

I don’t know precisely when the purpose of government morphed from protecting “Life, Liberty and Pursuit of Happiness” into “Micro-Managing Your Life Down to the Molecular Level,” but it has.

Steve confirmed these fears when I read his Good Question.

On the topic of surveillance, Mel might be in trouble.

In the arts, Archer at Lawyerworldland has discovered a cool thing: you can read Mozart’s manuscripts for yourself at the British Museum. If only I’d known before I started The Amadeus Net.

And one can only imagine what tawdry purposes this device will serve. Hat tip to Mr. Snitch for finding it.

Alternate History Fridays: Dr. Tundra Forsakes the Flying Spaghetti Monster

By on January 20, 2006 in Parody & Satire, Skwibby fiction

The Great Red Dragon and the Woman Clothed with the SunHis year at the Holy Writ Reeducation Retreat was up, and later that day, Dr. Maximilian Tundra would be asked to renounce the Flying Spaghetti Monster and evolution.

Kissing off the FSM would be easy — he’d only been preaching his brand of Norse Pastafarianism to make fun of creationism — but evolution?

How did one renounce science? On the other hand, he felt like he would do whatever it took to get out of there, because he couldn’t imagine living through another day of what was, ironically, hell.

When he’d received his punishment for teaching evolution, the Judge had made the Reeducation Retreat sound like a combination of Dachau and the Inquisition, when in fact, it was more like summer camp, with lots of Bibles. And sleep deprivation.

Then there were Writ counselors, hypodermics and pharmaceuticals at the ready. That’s when they weren’t hugging you and asking if you’d accepted Jesus as your personal savior yet or asking you to sing spirituals along with them. A lot of these counselors were virginal young women; unfortunately these nubile believers also toted genital clamps for the wayward souls who showed any interest whatsoever in their chaste bodies. (Dr. Tundra had experienced this first hand, so to speak, after an inadvertent glance at Sister Brittany’s not-to-be-ogled ta-tas. It had taken a month for his tackle to work properly again.)

Yep, Jesus was going to be his savior. Continue Reading →

Thursday O-Rama

By on January 19, 2006 in But is it art?, General Skwib

Nerd alert! Nerd alert! You may or may not experience the Vast Active Living Intelligence System if you go listen to this cool documentary about Philip K. Dick on the BBC website, available here. I experienced intense beams of pink light.

There is lighter fare in this feathery tale: Mouthy parrot reveals sex secrets
I don’t know, after reading this heartbreaking story, I have a sneaking suspicion that Ziggy was mocking its owner. Bastard parrot.

The Carnival of Satire #17

By on January 19, 2006 in Carnival of Satire

Carnival of Satire #17, with RobopopeYes, that’s robopope.

We begin this week’s Carnival of Satire at The Skwib on a rare literary high note. Jeremy at bardseyeview takes a lewd act and turns it into art in his post Romeo and Juliet and U of Penn. Warning: this post includes a sonnet, a discussion of iambic pentameter and public fornication.

Speaking of acts both lewd and public, The Evil Emperor Mindstation at Point Five learns Al Gore Arrested Ahead of ‘Police State’ Speech.

Tommy at Striving For Average discovers the recipe for a Chocolate City.

Over at Avant News Ion Zwitter relates how a Talking Points Delivery Mix-up Shakes American Right Wing

After reading Jerry Monaco at Shandean Postscripts to Politics, Philosophy, & Culture and his post, The War for Intelligent Design, Dr. Tundra is convinced we might find something about the FSM in the US Constitution. Continue Reading →

Keep the ‘naughty’ in naughty bits!

By on January 18, 2006 in But is it art?, Parody & Satire

flowerOr, why The Skwib does not support the Sex Party of Canada

It’s not just because they don’t have any candidates in this federal election, no it’s much more elemental than that.

Here at The Skwib, our editorial board feels that sex is best left to one’s prurient imagination. Heaven forefend that “sexual gradualism” be taught in our schools, which in the Sex Party platform is described as:

… a school sexual education program that encourages sexual activity – but in a gradual and disciplined way.

Discipline is not everyone’s cup of tea.

And when it comes to public nudity, the sight of all the differently shaped and sized . . . bits . . . has been the source of not only annoyance, but also a deep and abiding sense of unease. We feel there is a very real danger that this kind of activity will create an atmosphere that promotes bare bodies. This could presage a dangerous societal shift; imagine the horrors of a populace that is actually comfortable with the naked human body!

We feel that nudity should be treated as it used to be: it should be dirty!

That said, we think the party should be allowed to mail its “tasteful literature” via Canada Post. We also think that the editorial board of The Skwib would be an excellent venue for the party to decide if their literature was tasteful or not.

Inspired by:

Sex party sues Canada Post over leaflets | Sex Party platform