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A Week of Emily Chesley

By on November 27, 2007 in But is it art?, Hinky History

The Meanderings of the Emily Chesley Reading CircleWriter, poet, social activist, explorer, aviatrix, and 92-year-old pole vaulter: Emily Chesley played many roles in her long and remarkable life. This week I will be posting abridged excerpts from her biography, Get Bent: Emily Chesley’s Life of Speculation, which recounts the humble beginnings and formative experiences of the Speculative Songstress Of The Southwest.

You can read the first half of her biography in The Meanderings of the Emily Chesley Reading Circle, available at Alibris here. Until now the remarkable life of Emily Chesley has been overlooked by historians and literary researchers. Discover the humorous remedy to this literary travesty.

More about the Emily Chesley Reading Circle here.

By on November 14, 2007 in Asides

Humor-Blogs.com< --What the hell? A sidebar thingy, over here? This guy clearly doesn't know what he's doing, and you should click on it, just to escape his incompetence.

Professor Quippy: Oh, you’re such a tase

By on November 12, 2007 in Odd Science

Professor QuippySo, you’ve got a big day of activism planned, and you’re pretty sure it could mean an up-close and intimate encounter with the business end of a taser. So, how do you prevent yourself from getting a brutal case of taser burn and doing the electric two-step?

Well, a tiny bit of body armor might help. And while you’re at it, how about a nice layer of tin foil underneath the kevlar? Or even better, put on a shark suit or pair of piezoelectric pants (though the latte would only work if the officer hit you below the belt.)

More ideas are available at The Last Word, where the New Scientist asks the question, and the readers answer. Definitely check out the comments!

50-Metre Land Requisition Event

By on November 6, 2007 in Parody & Satire

50-Metre Land Requisition Event -- Beijing Olympic MascotsIn addition to Tibetan Dissident Biathlon, the 2008 Beijing Olympics will have another exciting new demonstration sport in Shooting: the 50-Metre Land Requisition Event.

Normally, the 50-metre Pistol competition is a solo sport, and does not include a running target (such as skeet or trap). But the 50-Metre Land Requisition Event combines all the excitement of team sports, shooting, and moving human targets. Many funs!

On one side, the “sanctioned” team, which is usually backed by local communist authorities or enterprises, and consists of three crack pistol marksmen. On the other side, the hapless Chinese inhabitants of urban areas that the party would like to sell to developers. This is not a team, so much as a disorganized mob of men, women and children attempting to avoid a hail of well-placed bullets while protesting their forcible eviction. The Beijing Olympic committee has set this event in Shanghai, where there is quite a bit of land not being put to the “best” (profitable) use.

So far, Zimbabwe, Angola, and Burma have said they’ll be sending teams. China is the hands-down favorite, having had so much practice forcibly evicting people to create venues for the Beijing Games.

More demonstration sports with the Beijing Olympic Mascots:
Tibetan Dissident Biathlon | Organ Relay | Hu Flung Falongong | Forced Sterilization Footy | Press Clubbing | 50-Meter Land Requisition Event

‘Inspired’ by:
Amnesty International 2006 China Report, and their Countdown to the Olympics