In the annals of unintended consequences, few are as baffling as this new finding that suggests alcohol helps protect the brain from head injuries.
A study of 38,000 people with noggin’ trauma discovered that for every 100 people who died when sober, only 88 died when they had a little liquor in their limbic system.
According to Lead researcher Ali Salim of the Cedars-Sinai Medical Center in Los Angeles: “We need a better understanding of the exact mechanism, the appropriate dose and specific timing of treatment before we can embark on clinical trials.”
Woo! Sign me up! Free booze.
Oh wait, I’ll probably have to get whacked on the head too, won’t I?
Ah, it’s just another Saturday night down at the pub.
Lest we get too excited about all this, you should know Salim also warns us that alcohol actually causes half of all head injuries. We shall call this the Irony Factor.