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Spot the Newton!

newtonHello and welcome to today’s edition of Spot the Newton, where you pick out the UNtrue facts about Sir Isaac Newton:

  • was unquestioningly one of the most important scientists ever
  • died a virgin
  • had a passion for alchemy above all else
  • once poked a needle in his eye to test an optical theory
  • used his roommate’s towel (for who knows what purpose)
  • inventedĀ a bed-wetting machine for pranking his fellow students
  • punched his sister
  • developed the calculus (Gottfried Leibniz also did this)
  • had a crossbow, and lied about it to his grandmother
  • lived for one year on a diet of apples
  • was a religious nutjob who learned Hebrew so he could discover the “secret” meaning of the Bible
  • threatened to burn down his mother and step-father’s house
  • beat the shit out of Arthur Storer
  • needed to relax a bit.

Answers accepted in the comments, or via the FB page.

Alltop has a passion for the alchemy of humor. Sources: io9, Facts/Legends, but no cheating. Image by Stavros Damos.