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Category: Parody & Satire

Alternate History Fridays: Hirohito Looks Over His To Do List

Rising Sun FlagFor an old, old man, it had been a busy week, but there was still more to do before the bureaucrats took the weekend off.

He’d managed to deflect the moderates, who felt Japan should apologize for the bombings of San Francisco and Los Angeles; it was 60 years ago, and he wished people would just forget the past. They should think about the future. As though they should apologize! No matter how horrible, those bombs saved millions of lives – many of them Japanese. To think he’d almost told that fruitcake Hitler that they didn’t want the a-bomb technology. What a mistake that would have been!

And he’d successfully screwed the Chinese over again. Heh. Must drive them nuts, he thought. For the third time, China got the Asian Free Trade Board to rule in their favor on the rice duties Japan had been imposing, but he told his people to ignore it. But what could China do? They had lots of land and peasants, but no army. No technology. (It all came back to their nuclear arsenal again, didn’t it?)

But the nuclear arsenal was not going to fix the problem in Arabia, where the fundamentalists were waging a successful insurgency against the Imperial occupation. You couldn’t nuke everything. It would just take more troops. Perhaps more levies from Korea and Manchuria.

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