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Forty-seven signs of the apocalypse (#38)

From the Book of Libations

Bacon-flavoured vodka -- a chocolate bakon martini!Lo! The time shall come and the people shall not concern themselves with the Law. And in this dark time, the people shall crave the flesh of the pig, and many will not care that it is Forbidden.

Verily, many shall be law abiding, but still ingest the unclean creature in a form most alluring. And this Savory Succubus shall take hold of the people, and there will be frying, and the power of the sky will be applied to these strips of meat, and the people will rejoice in the salty evil.

And they shall be called the Days of Bacon.

The Rashers of Lucifer will garnish all kinds of wholesome foods, and make them unclean with their cholesterol and deliciousness.

Hark! The people shall revel in their porcine pleasures, and they shall not be sated by the strips themselves, and they shall Cry for More Bacon. And they shall crave bacon with all. And the Anti-Christ will grin, and say unto the people, “I shall give you bacon in your hooch.”

And there shall be great rejoicing as the people debase themselves with Chocolate Bacon Martinis, and Bacon Rosemary Martinis, and something called an Irish Boar. And they shall wail with pleasure, especially when they taste the Bacon Bloody Mary, as the next seal is broken and the sky turns all stripy and sizzly, and let’s face it, mouth-watering.

The awesome web-based proof. The always-debauched Alltop is waiting for veal-flavoured gin. Originally published August 19, 2009.



  1. So do you think that is bacon salt around the rim?

  2. Perhaps bacon fat? I dunno, but it makes me shudder.

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