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Parsing the want ads

old photo of men in lab coats cleaning a hippo
Are you ready for an exciting career?
An award-winning, International company is looking for unique individuals with leadership ability. We are one of the fastest growing companies in the fastest growing industry in the world!

Are you ready to dive in and clean up? Your training will be provided. Absolutely no experience necessary. If you have integrity, a good work ethic and a strong stomach, the opportunities for advancement are only limited by how long you can work. We’ll provide the tools, the knowhow, and don’t worry about life insurance — we’ll pay for that too.

All you need to bring is your desire to succeed!

Alltop wants to succeed. Photo via Twisted Vintage. Originally published June, 2010.


  1. This is a good reminder of how important it is to ask questions during the interview about what specific tasks a job entails.

  2. I agree. Though to be fair, I’m not sure that I would think to ask, “will I have to routinely stick my arm into the gaping maw of an angry three-ton ungulate?”

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