The Carnival of Satire (#22)

In lieu of doing something original this week, we have decided to rip off Despair.com to introduce this week’s Carnival of Satire. Enjoy.

Achievement

You can do anything you set your mind to, when you have vision, determination, and an endless supply of expendable labor.

SquirtCheez found a Housewife Upset to See Sports During NBC’s Olympics Coverage. People skiing is crass. They should be falling. Tumbling. Breaking things.

Mistakes

It could be the purpose of your life is only to serve as a warning for others.

Madeleine Begun Kane at Mad Kane’s Notables has some more Dick Cheney humor with Faking Contrition – Song Parody.

Despair

It’s always darkest just before it goes pitch black.

Big Cajun Man (aka Alan) at Canadian Financial Blog reminded us the brilliance of the demotivation poster, with Work: Despair Inc. Strikes Again.

Pretension

The downside of being better than everyone else is that people tend to assume you’re pretentious.

Tommy at Striving For Average presents The Cat Fight.

Quality

The race for quality has no finish line. So really it’s more like a death march.

Phil Shapiro has found a few Search Engine Incentives.

Madness

Madness does not howl. Sometimes is a quiet voice at the end of the day saying, “Hey, is there room in your head for one more?”

Kirby at Kirby on Finance asks the question Should I put the toilet seat down? The answer, in case you want to ever have sex again, is “yes.”

Jiggy at presents the Quip of the Day – Drugs

Compromise

Let’s agree to respect each other’s views, no matter how wrong you may be.

We can see how lots of people living in Bushworld actually might want to move to this mythical place discovered by Radar called Algorica (except for the stuff at the end, or course).

Peace Moonbeam relates the The Texas NeoCon Massacre.

Idiocy

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

Remulak MoxArgon at The MoxArgon Group presents InterGalactic Roundtable 2.

Mr. Right presents Long Feared “Bush Purge” Reportedly Now Underway, “Reality Based Community” Crying Out for Action

Pressure

It can turn a lump of coal into a flawless diamond or an average person into a perfect basketcase.

It would be excellent form to go to the Despair.com site and buy one of their demotivating products, and it might even prevent them from sending us angry letters from overpaid lawyers. Probably not though.

Thanks to everyone for the demotivation. Remember you can submit here with this handy form; the COS is listed at the Ubercarnival, and at the Blog Carnival too.