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Zoological Wonders from Planet Earth

French HarpyThe French Harpy once roamed free in the pre-Euclidian Dynamic Structure Era, somewhat before the ascendancy of today’s Hyper-Clones, but well after the Genetic Fruit-Topping Wars.

When we say, “roamed”, we really mean “flew”, because as you can see from this French Harpy we meticulously reconstructed from a fragment of DNA, the Frarpy — as it was known colloquially — had rudimentary legs that was incapable of doing much more than gripping tree branches and wallets. Even from a flying perspective, the Frarpy was not well-designed, and could barely achieve enough velocity to cause lift.

However, they had pinpoint accuracy whenever they wanted to crap on someone, and a voice that was excruciating. The only other species of harpy with a more painful call was the Asian Harpy, though they tended to be less well-endowed and not nearly as nice dressers.

Alltop and humor-blogs.com prefer the Asian harpy.

From Toulouse Le Grandfig in the Land of the Future.


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  2. Well it isn’t a very aerodynamic looking thing is it. The boobs might help, but the head…

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