Author Archive | Mark A. Rayner

A Bottle and a Friend

Robbie BurnsThere’s nane that’s blest of human kind,
But the cheerful and the gay, man,
Fal, la, la, etc.

Here’s a bottle and an honest friend!
What wad ye wish for mair, man?
Wha kens, before his life may end,
What his share may be o’ care, man?

Then catch the moments as they fly,
And use them as ye ought, man:
Believe me, happiness is shy,
And comes not aye when sought, man.

Other Titles Ta’ Raise A Brow:

  • Bessy and Her Spinnin’ Wheel
  • Cock Up Your Beaver
  • The Fornicator
  • Nine Inch Will Please a Lady
Alltop will be raisin’ a wee dram this evening in honour of his birthday.

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This is a scream

He survived a tour of duty in Afghanistan. He’s tough. He’s a marine. But Adam was not prepared for the lying ways of the carnies operating the Giant Slingshot.

Alltop screams like a little girl too! Video via Reddit

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The five second rule

red buddhaIt was the best game of zenball ever, and the crowd was wild with excitement: the whisper of butterfly wings was deafening.

The Rotrovra Koan Kangaroos had just scored their first all-in kensho, and the Targenville Half-Lotus Lions replied with a double-satori. The Roos launched a full-out dharma walk, but they were unable to penetrate the Lions’ impressive grasp of paradox.

The Roos had to do something or the Lions would surely win. The hush of the field filled with the deadly susurration of arrows, as they invoked the five second rule.

Afterwards, only the voice of a bamboo flute.

Alltop is the sound of one hand clapping. Originally published on Name Your Tale as The five second rule. Buddha courtesy of Kim Denise.

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