Yep. Potato.
Author Archive | Mark
Existential graphic design
It has always astonished me how many branding efforts (or god help me, “rebranding” efforts) are actually exercises in logo design. Your logo is not your identity. And vice versa.
This is already a very lucrative field for many advertising companies. You do some focus group work, a survey or two, and then write up some generic description of the client’s organization. Then, give them Circle Logo Number 4, with Blue Instead of Black, and change the kerning on the text.
Voila, another organization has averted an existential crisis! If only there could be such a simple process for individuals.
Alltop has no existential worries at all. Cartoon by the talented lunchbreath
The tragedy of bad design
Alltop doesn’t even know what a g-spot is.
Vampire Kitteh
I can haz hoo-man bludz?
Alltop is more worried about Werewolf Puppies. vampire kitten Originally uploaded by sween
Bob, descendant of Queen Victoria, was never a joiner
He had to admit the outfit was pretty spectacular, and the fringe benefits of membership were pretty good too — not only would it forestall your evisceration via tongs and razor-fingers, but you also got to run the world.
The Fraternity of the Cone had been in charge since the Counter-Reformation, but they’d kept their nifty hats mostly on the down-low, only wearing them on extended “hunts” and during their annual Ribfest. Bob had been tracked by the “recruitment committee” for several days in the Scottish Highlands (at least, Bob surmised it was Scotland — he’d awakened in the thick grass and heather instead of his Boston apartment two days ago.)
They just couldn’t seem to take no for an answer, and Bob thought they were serious about the tongs and finger-blades thing, so he had one of two choices: let them feed on his intestines, or vaporize them all with his laser vision.
He sighed. So much for his white suit.
Alltop is totally in the cone. The Conemen. Originally uploaded by laurence.winram
Pantomime Jaw-Warbler
Albert Ploof was an early pioneer in the field of haberdaeronics, and celebrated throughout Europe, despite the fact that his mother was Jewish and his father was a mime. He entertained throughout the courts of Europe, telling of plans to conquer one of the great mysteries of time — can man fly using only a hat?
After the success of the Wright Brothers in 1903, he was commanded by the Belgian king, Leopold II, to find a way for a man to fly, using only the power of science.
“May I also include a hat?” Ploof asked his king.
“Of course. I thought the hat went without saying. The hat’s fucking OBVIOUS!”
“Excellent, sire.”
This photograph was taken shortly before his inaugural flight — to get better lift, Ploof opted to launch from the highest point in Belgium, the Signal de Botrange. At 718 meters altitude, Ploof believed he would have enough acceleration to fly. Unfortunately, the tower was only six meters high, so all he did was break his legs.