(from the 2037 Hammacher Schlemmer Glaven catalog)
This is a six-foot Christmas tree that pops up instantly and is pre-decorated with original artwork by renowned holiday artist Thomas Kinkaid, all of which can dispense Viritron’s patented Santa Virus.
The tree rises from a flat position in concentric circles to its full thirty-inch width and seventy-six-inch height, and simply hangs on the included stand, in which is embedded a Viritron Aerosol Dispensing Unit, capable of infecting anyone within a two-hundred foot radius of the tree with a virus that will guarantee you have a good Christmas.
Three hundred glistening clear lights are nestled among the branches and cast a warm glow on the seventy richly-painted globe ornaments, that will be sure to distract your customers from the brief intense psychic pain they will feel upon contact with the Santa Virus, as it coerces them to buy more gifts than they can afford. The tree has two additional gold and burgundy ribbons, 15 velvet-like poinsettias, and a golden bow, which has a rebreather and a two-minute oxygen supply embedded in it, if you are inadvertently caught in your store while the tree is circulating the Santa Virus. The tree collapses for easy storage for the off-season. (15lbs. Santa Virus sold separately.)
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This is the robotic vacuum that navigates autonomously through your home up to seven times per week, where it can either clean your floors or patrol for intruders. The unit’s specially designed dual, counter-rotating agitator brushes spread carpet fibers and enable the vacuum to remove hair and other detritus from low- and high-pile carpets, while its dual Class VII lasers are capable of vaporizing any intruders (or more likely, unwanted refuse left on the floor). 
This levitation belt earned The Best rating from the Hammacher Schlemmer Glaven Institute because it was the easiest to put on and operate while falling from a building.