Letter of Annoyance

The Globe & Mail,
The National Post

Dear Editors:

Now that we are well into fall, and the possibility of inflaming passions beyond the realm of civil discussion is less likely, we feel it is time to address a situation that becomes more annoying with each passing summer.

We refer, of course, to the growing popularity of nude sunbathing.

The sight of all the differently shaped and sized . . . bits . . . has been the source of not only annoyance, but also a deep and abiding sense of unease.  We feel there is a very real danger that this kind of activity will create an atmosphere that promotes bare bodies. This could presage a dangerous societal shift; imagine the horrors of a populace that is actually comfortable with the naked human body.

We feel that nudity should be treated as it was in Emily Chesley's day (in the Late Victorian period): it should be dirty!

So we implore you: please ask your readers to keep themselves covered. Keep the 'naughty' in naughty bits!

We trust that these suggestions will be treated with the seriousness with which they have been given.

Yours truly,

 

Mark A. Rayner, Esq.
For the Emily Chesley Reading Circle