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Classics of Literature — Dystopias & Post-Apocalyptic Hijinks (#1)

By on November 3, 2010 in But is it art?

1984

1984 coverI’m not sure why everyone is so freaked out about this pretty ordinary tale about a door-to-door salesman and his quest for meaning in a brutal work environment. The love affair between Winston and Julia is touching, though I’m not sure why it’s so …more I’m not sure why everyone is so freaked out about this pretty ordinary tale about a door-to-door salesman and his quest for meaning in a brutal work environment. The love affair between Winston and Julia is touching, though I’m not sure why it’s so important that she fetishes the vacuum attachments Winston is trying to sell her on their first meeting.

I was rather impressed by Orwell’s ability to predict the invention of Creep-Vee, “The Television that Watches You!” (I’m not a big fan, though I know most of the kids really like it, especially the shows where they get to vote on who has to eat the raw goat’s anus)

I was also impressed by Orwell’s ability to predict the rise of Fox News.

The Road

The RoadYou’d think an adventurous post-apocalyptic story would have more pitched sea battles and swordplay, so I was really disappointed with this book. There was only one boat, no pirates, and the violence wasn’t very romantic.

There is some baby-eating, which I found disturbing. Disturbing enough that even this effort won’t clear it from my consciousness:

the road portable meal systems

I dares ya to buy it as a t-shirt.

Alltop likes its baby with carrots.

MONKEY SEE (A Gorilla of a Review)

By on June 22, 2009 in But is it art?, Monkeys!

MONKEY SEE -- cover artMONKEY SEE is a charming and satirical examination of the question: “what would happen if monkeys could talk, and they had their own 401(k)s?”

It is also a love story, an etiquette manual for talking apes, parenting help for said primates, and a demented “how-to” guide for the aspiring evil scientist.

You’ll notice I used the words “evil scientist”, not “mad scientist”, because really, you can’t explain anything to mad scientists. They spend most of their time frothing at the mouth or terrorizing the village after drinking/injecting/inserting/stepping into/ or otherwise using the newly minted insane formula/device they have created to solve the problem of “what should I do this afternoon after I’ve finished eating bugs?”

Evil scientists, on the other hand, have a plan.

So it is with Dr. Harold Cogitomni, who is hatching a diabolical (evil) plan, to turn a Spider Monkey (Gigi), into a 60-foot, poison-breathing (to be clear, breath that is poisonous to others), crystal-spike-tailed behemoth capable of crushing houses and tanks. (Always a useful ability in a behemoth, or even your run-of-the-mill leviathan.) Continue Reading →