And we’re not talking about the sexy kind that prowl the Wortley Roadhouse on Friday nights.
It’s the bitey, clawey, eat-your-Shitsu kind!
Professor Quippy: The tingle means it’s killing you
Oscar Wilde once said, “Moderation is a fatal thing. Nothing succeeds like excess.”
But he wasn’t talking about Bengay, he was talking about art.
The tragic death of a high school athlete shows us all an exception that proves Wilde’s rule. (I can hear all the logicians cringing out there.) Apparently, she inadvertently killed herself by applying too much anti-inflammatory muscle cream. Or, it might be possible that her body just absorbed an abnormal amount of the active — and in this case, lethal — ingredient, methyl salicylate.
The medical examiner thinks it was the amount she applied, so there’s a lesson for all us in this — if it’s medicine, use it as suggested by the maker.
So put down that tube of EngorgeIt! If it hasn’t worked by now, then a tenth slathering probably won’t either.
Story here: Muscle cream blamed for death of teen runner
Thou Shalt Go to The Carnival of the Godless
Akusai at Action Sketics has put together a fabulous carnival, based on the “lost” commandments.
Ask General Kang: How many Iraqis do we have to kill before we declare victory over the oil fields of the Middle East?
Well, you’ve had at least one serious go at the Iraqis before and you didn’t claim victory, so it’s doubtful that you’ll be able to do so this time … Unless you’re willing to take bold steps.
I had a similar experience back in the days BEFORE I became an evil galactic overlord, when I still thought of myself as a “freedom fighter”.
Of course, once I actually embraced my creepy (and somewhat musky) iniquity, I finally made some progress; first I wiped out the crack Wiffle-Bat-with-Electrodes Legion of the reigning dictator Blufnark the Batty, and then I took over the Simian Senate through guile, suasion and giving more backrubs to senile orangutans than I care to discuss.
But then I prevailed. And really, I didn’t have to kill that many citizens.
So my advice is go ahead, admit that you’re evil, and really just take over. Besides, Iraq is just one letter different from your own country’s name, so changing the maps afterwards will be easy.
Uh, I’m writing from the US
Oh … well, the map thing WILL be a challenge.
Next time: How often should I change the oil in my broken-down-yet-faster-than-anything-else spaceship? Also, how do you get the smell of Wookie out of suede?
Tip of the hat to Johnny Smoke for today’s provocative question.
Professor Quippy: Enjoy those flat screens while they last
That beautiful flat screen you’re reading these well-crafted words with is an ephemeral thing.
Not only will it stop working someday, the material needed to create it is much rarer than you think.
According to the New Scientist:
Armin Reller, a materials chemist at the University of Augsburg in Germany, and his colleagues are among the few groups who have been investigating the problem. He estimates that we have, at best, 10 years before we run out of indium. Its impending scarcity could already be reflected in its price: in January 2003 the metal sold for around $60 per kilogram; by August 2006 the price had shot up to over $1000 per kilogram.
So stop poking it with your pen!
Carnival Catch-up
Ahh. Behind again.
The Friday Ark (all things furry, fish and foul)
The Storyblogging Carnival , including some intriguing 50-word stories. (I liked Ancient Vessel.)