Archive | August, 2009

The New Season of Mad Men

By Mark A. Rayner on August 31, 2009 in Bluish, Monkeys!, Parody & Satire, Toulouse Le Grandfig

The new season of Mad Men It had been an off-hand comment. Passionate, but completely unrehearsed.

They’d just finished watching the opening show of the new Mad Men season, and Bob turned to his wife Janice, and said, “you know, I really don’t think you could improve upon this show. This really is the best thing on television right now. No scratch that. The best thing NEAR television. There’s no way you could make it any better. I mean, it’s historically accurate. It’s dramatic. God-damned it Janice, it’s just fucking exciting. It’s the best thing ever, I tell you!”

Grinding her teeth, Janice thought, “Wait ’till you get back from work tomorrow … I’ll show you exciting…”

Alltop and humor-blogs.com think Joan is hot. Photo via Strange Ink.

Boating

By Mark A. Rayner on August 28, 2009 in Hinky History, Toulouse Le Grandfig

the Jessuptians, a Puritan sect similar to the Baptists

Founded by Jesleyan Fortran Jessup, the Jessuptians, a Puritan sect similar to the Baptists, but less fun, would have become a major influence in Colonial politics.

If they had understood how boats worked.

Alltop and humor-blogs.com think that all-in-all, it’s just another brick… Photo via Postaltrice.

Sometimes a cigar is only a cigar (redux)

By Mark A. Rayner on August 26, 2009 in Bluish, Toulouse Le Grandfig

Archery class at Camp Oonaway There was no doubt about it, Max’s favourite activity at Camp Oonaway was archery.

There was nothing more satisfying than getting help with his stance, finding the right way to draw, keeping one’s fingers firm, yet loose, while lowering the bow into position. The delicious twang and thwap as he released the shaft.

And don’t even get him started on how exciting it was to hit the bulls eye.

Alltop and humor-blogs.com both enjoy fletching. Photo via Retrozone.

How it all began, I mean, AFTER the nuclear explosion

By Mark A. Rayner on August 25, 2009 in Monkeys!, Parody & Satire, Toulouse Le Grandfig

Hello, you are calling Soto Noodle! [phone rings]

Sumiko: Soto Noodle — you will want to suck them fast!

Godzilla: So you serve noodles?

Sumiko: Yes sir, we are noodle shop.

Godzilla: Excellent, I’d like an order of noodles, shaken not stirred.

[pause]

Sumiko: I’m sorry sir, what you say?

Godzilla: No, wait I’ve changed my mind. Is your refrigerator running?

Sumiko: Of course it is sir.

Godzilla: Then you’d better go catch it! No wait, say “is your refrigerator running!”

Sumiko: Fuck uh you, sir!

[sound of Gozilla screeching in city-rending rage on other end]

Alltop and humor-blogs.com definitely have Prince Albert in a can! Photo via Postaltrice.

Venn Diagrams of Publishing, Hypocrisy and Despair

By Mark A. Rayner on August 24, 2009 in But is it art?, Parody & Satire

Okay, this one isn’t entirely original, but I have tarted it up a bit. Made me laugh because of its truthiness, and lest you think I am judging, I fall into the “bloggers” category too!

Venn Diagrams of Hypocrisy

I found the original at The Atlantic here.

You may also want to check out another older one, Economies of Despair:

The commentary is a hoot.

Now, please help me prove this second one wrong by going to my publisher’s website, and buying a copy of Marvellous Hairy. (Only $16.80 Canadian.) Let me know you did so in the comments, and I’ll send you a bookplate (with my signature if you want it, just say so!)

Then you will prove the diagram actually looks more like this, and I think we all want that:

The vagaries of taste