If you’re looking for a little afternoon reading, why not check out the always-entertaining Carnival of the Insanities?
Or perhaps you are feeling sluggish and you need gratuitous amounts of energy. Forget Brawndo, what you need is PowerThirst:
Humor-blogs.com has the power of 400 screaming babies.
Ever since he’d started making the cave paintings, Thag had noticed that the women in the Thunka Grunka clan had been looking at him differently.
Perhaps it was his position as the leader of the hunting party, but he thought it had more to do with his artwork.
Whatever the case, he was gettin’ some on a regular basis.
Nominally, he was still mated to Onga, but she had all but deserted him for that scrotum-with-eyes shaman, Weasel-Scratch-Face-Brother. In fact, it had been Onga’s desertion, and his ensuing depression, which had spurred Thag into creating more artwork for the cave.
The younger unmated women of the clan seemed to like his deft representations of the animals they hunted, particularly Vunga, the half-daughter of the Shaman.
“It looks so spiritual,” Vunga would say whenever he completed a painting.
“Thag suffer for art,” he confided, looking pained, unsure, filled with angst.
“Oh, poor Thag,” Vunga would say, and then take him by the hand so that they could go for a “walk” in the forest.
On such occasions, Thag could swear he could hear the sound of Weasel’s teeth grinding from his shaman’s perch outside the cave.
“Thag do art for Vunga tomorrow,” he would promise as they walked into the shaded trees, her hips swaying like the boughs in the breeze.
You can discover more about Sex and the single artist here. Other sexy beasts here.
Welcome to the Carnival of Satire, where you can momentarily forget your worries about the impending meltdown of the US economy. (Stop smirking all you Albertans!)
Rickey Henderson is not only a great baseball player, but he’s financial wizard. Learn how to rise above the economic collapse with Rickey’s Stock Market Tips.
Brent Diggs has an important note about What The Promised Recession Means To You As An American. Our apologies to all the non-American readers. (May or may not include Canadians.)
Gameguy has discovered The Problem with Talking Animals. Yes, we were also surprised there was only one problem.
Elisson butts into the carnival once again with a real cracker of a story: READER.
Ben courts decranialization danger with this wonderful Potential Death Metal Album Title.
There is more information about President Bush’s package in this post by Ellis Reed than you will probably care to know: Bush’s Most Eloquent Press Conference.
Still on the political scene, Robbie Mitchell takes us deep into the Senate (ew) with this chat: what happens in estonia… “You have been invited to a conference chat with Raising_McCain and thatshillaryous1026. Do you accept? y.
O’rene Ashley continues the excellent series on How to Get Into An Ivy League School (Part 2).
Greg Merrick presents Not Only Does My Son Have A Learning Disability, He’s A Complete Idiot.
Gus presents Another irsmind.com film: “Any Given Tax Season”.
And once again, we’ll finish up with the only non-satire pick of the Carnival: Edith presents this useful information about the Three Golden Rule of Presentation by Guy Kawasaki (in YouTube video form.) Loathers and users of PowerPoint may find it especially entertaining.
And that’s it for this recession-proof edition! If you have some satire to share, please consider submitting next time. What is satire? Someone wrote something about it once, we think. Thanks to these fine folks for helping us with webby-stuff: the Blog Carnival for their form; and the listings at the Ubercarnival, Ferdy’s permanent floating ping festival, and for the listings at the Blog Carnival too. Also, you may find some satire here if you dig around a bit. Thanks to Erinsikorskystwart for the picture of the one-quarter-eaten Recession Special at Gray’s Papaya. ($3.50 US for two dogs and a drink.)
Technorati tags: carnival of satire, satire, humor.
Rickey has an overwhelming meme that must be obeyed:
Okay, here goes. Some are ridiculously easy, but I think I have a few curves in there too:
Okay, I hereby tag the following unfortunates with this bad boy: Aloysius, Archer, Bagel, Ellison & Richmond. If you would like to be tagged, let me know and I’ll add you to the list. Or you could just play.
Now, if that wasn’t enough excitement, you can also check out the Carnival of the Insanities or last week’s The Friday Ark.
Still not satisfied. Here is a video about a kickass drink:
The excellent photo is by margolove. And these guys need to stop drinking so much Brawndo.
I somehow turned them off, and for that, my abject apologies. Feel free to berate me below.
I’m still recovering from the latest leap forward, so I may be cranky, but the evidence is mounting that daylight savings time (DST) is a BAD IDEA.
In two studies, the numbers show that traffic accidents increase by about seven percent the days following the jump and industrial accidents increase by about six percent.
According to the lead researcher of one of the studies, Stanley Coren, the problem is sleep deprivation. People are chronically sleep deprived in North America, the sleep expert says. Take away an extra hour and they start falling into periods of “micro-sleep.”
“Micro-sleep” lasts between 10 seconds and a minute, and causes a total loss of bodily function. Actually, you lose track of the time-space continuum, which is fine if you’re sitting in my first-year undergraduate lecture on the nature of the space-time continuum, but possibly lethal if you’re operating a chainsaw, minigun, or something moving, such as a car.
I know what you’re thinking. DST saves energy, right? Wrong. According to a 2006 California study, DST actually cost an extra $8.6-million (U.S.) in electricity.
Not to mention the cost of all the lawsuits in chainsaw-related injury claims.
More information in The Mother of All Mondays. You’ll discover a coterie of chainsaw enthusiasts here.