Navigation

Wednesday-O-Rama

By on March 22, 2006 in General Skwib

Carnivals:
Obi Wan has done another great job hosting, this time the Carnival of Liberty.

I always find this carnival interesting — for the stuff I disagree with as much as the stuff I do. Centrerion’s post, the Debate on Afghanistan Widens, is one of those. When you look at the news this morning, and see that a man in Afghanistan might be executed for converting to Christianity, you have to wonder why the heck Canada has sent troops there. I mean, if there aren’t compelling economic or geopolitical reasons to be there, at the very least we should be supporting liberty there, not state-compelled religion. I’d like a debate in the House about it.

And I enjoyed Mover Mike’s ruminations on the Declaration of Independence as it pertains to V for Vendetta.

Some Funny Stuff from the Conservative Cat.

The Carnival of the Vanities, ably hosted by Blogger Idol!

From the blogroll:
A parable from Leslie’s Omnibus about North American management practices that should not be missed. (Scroll below the chalkboard pic.)

Why has the Democratic Party been so inneffective? Because of the transgendered midgets, according to the Rev.

Humungous Media to trademark theâ„¢ word theâ„¢

By on March 21, 2006 in Parody & Satire, Skwibby fiction

superman stampNew York (The Skwib) — After learning that DC and Marvel Comics were attempting to trademark the term “super-hero”, the media giant Humungous Media quickly moved to trademark (â„¢) the word “the”.

“This is purely a business decision, and Humungous Media will vigorously defend the trademark when we get it,” a confident, D. Incus Pweeb, VP of Corporate Communications and Propaganda told The Skwib.

“We feel this will make it easier for us to take over the other media giants, and in short order, we will then go after all independent media. Can you imagine producing any kind of news or entertainment without the definite article ‘the’? It will be really cool. Let Marvel and DC have super-hero. They’ll be screwed without “the” (trademark pending).”

However, Manky Media, a Yorkshire company that produces a weekly newspaper, is unconcerned.

“Yer, other companies may be jiggered by gob slotch Humungous and their brass-grab, but we don’t need definite article, not at Manky,” Horatio Jeeks, CEO of Manky Media said.

“Worked down at mill, then started Manky, gipping out news. This trademark no reason to ugger mugger.”

The interview left The Skwib muck lathered and mawngy.

Inspired by:
Boing boing — Marvel Comics: stealing our language

Yorkshire to English Translation:

  • brass = money
  • gipping = vomiting
  • gob slotch = greedy
  • jiggered = exhausted
  • manky = rough
  • mawngy = bad tempered
  • muck lathered = sweaty
  • ugger mugger = panic

Thoughts about Ur-Fascism

By on March 20, 2006 in Parody & Satire

Parody of fascism posterWe saw this poster today, which is a great parody of 1930s-1940s propaganda posters. Rather than dismiss it as paranoid, we read some of the articles the authors of the poster had on their page. When we came across Umberto Eco’s “Eternal Fascism: Fourteen Ways of Looking at a Blackshirt”, by Umberto Eco, we were eager to read the whole 1995 essay. He’s a magnificent novelist and a provocative thinker .

The last point in his piece really rang some bells, particularly when it comes to the subject of the media:

Ur-Fascism speaks Newspeak

Newspeak was invented by Orwell, in Nineteen Eighty-Four, as the official language of what he called Ingsoc, English Socialism. But elements of Ur-Fascism are common to different forms of dictatorship. All the Nazi or Fascist schoolbooks made use of an impoverished vocabulary, and an elementary syntax, in order to limit the instruments for complex and critical reasoning. But we must be ready to identify other kinds of Newspeak, even if they take the apparently innocent form of a popular talk show.

This is just an aside, but tomorrow is the anniversary of the completion of Dachau. (1933) The Eco article is here. You can find the poster and the other articles they have linked here.

We’ll return to writing humor tomorrow. Assuming we can get over being freaked out.

The Journalist: More Trustworthy than the Prison Snitch

By on March 20, 2006 in Parody & Satire

Press HatMontreal (The Skwib) — In their yearly survey of how much trust we have in a variety of occupations, Leger Marketing discovered that journalists were more trusted than quite a few other occupations.

Nearly 49 percent of Canadians felt that journalists were more trustworthy than “wise” guys, prison snitches, French lovers, lawyers, used car salesemen and of course, politicians.

(Politicians have been at the bottom of the annual poll, since it was started four years ago. This year 14 percent of respondents felt politicians were trustworthy. It should be noted that when you look at the cross-tabulated data, this 14 percent coincides with those Canadians who do not pay any attention to current events that are not reported in People magazine.)

“We are really pleased with these results,” Phillip R. Hack, President of the Canadian Journalists’ Association (CJA) told The Skwib. “We’ve been aiming to be seen as more trustworthy than used car salesmen for many years, and this if the first time that we’ve done so. It’s a great day for journalists everywhere.

Interestingly, pollsters were not included in the survey.

The Skwib tried to contact the Association of Prison Snitches for comment, but they left us hanging.

Inspired by:
Sponsorship effect seen in survey of most-trusted professions: pollster

Carnival O-Rama!

By on March 20, 2006 in General Skwib

We’ev been away from the computer for a few days, so we have some catchin’ up to do on the Carnival front. Thanks to the following:

The Big Guy Checks the Numbers

By on March 17, 2006 in Parody & Satire, Skwibby fiction

The big guy checks the numbers“Okay chief, I got some bad news. Your numbers are down again.”

“You’re shittin’ me.”

“I’m afraid not, Your Mightiness,” the PR flack looked at his shimmering clipboard and said, “according to this, you’re down to less than one percent.”

“What?” Thunder shook the hallway, and a few of the other people in the communications office looked down at their desks.

“I have some good news. If you look at the segmented audiences, you are way up in the head-banging heavy metal market. Fully six percent of them believe you exist.”

“Six percent?”

“I don’t know what to tell you Thor, they just aren’t going for the Nordic gods anymore. In some ways, you’re lucky to still be with us. I heard that Baldur just disappeared last week.”

“What do you mean disappeared? He’s the God of Peace, fer Christ’s sake.”

“Once you drop below a critical level, well …” The PR flack blew on his fingers, and spread them apart. “Poof, you cease to exist. I mean, Baldur was hardly known by anyone except a few scholars and D&D freaks, let alone worshipped.”

“How am I doing with the D&D crowd?” Thor asked. Not that long ago, he was embarrassed to be prayed to in game situations, but now it seemed like the only thing standing between him and non-existence. Continue Reading →