This collection at Flickr is fun and educational. I never really understood l33tspeak before, and now I feel like less of a noob. And if you’re looking for more to make you FOFL, may I recommend this site?
Ask General Kang: Um, is it time to panic?
You humans still have primitive brains, so I will try to be understanding about this need of yours to panic.
One of your wisest humans wrote a book, upon the cover of which was the phrase “DON’T PANIC”. This is excellent advice, and the first thing you must learn if you ever hope to:
- evolve
- dabble in intergalactic travel
- keep your portfolio intact in times of irrational exuberance and abject, lower-primate, the-leopard-is-going-to-eat-me moments of dread.
At this moment of your insignificant planet’s history, you have given a large part of efforts to an institution which (and let’s not gild the lily on this one) runs on the base emotions of greed and fear. So, on occasion, you will have to face the fear. But those of you who rise above it, who listen to the wisdom of your great prophet, will evolve.
But I suspect that not enough of you will get there before my armada arrives with its legions of uber-chimps, armed with hyper-kazoos and tutus.
Then what?
Then it’s time for you to panic.
Next time: What does it mean when your cat beats you at chess? And should he be able to levitate like that?
More reasons not to panic here.
(Photo credit: Marvin (PA))
Don’t judge too quickly
Via the talented Spencer Evans. Also seen on humor-blogs.com
Professor Quippy: More words not to use to describe Ebola
According to the BBC, a researcher at the University of Wisconsin has created a “safe” and “harmless” version of the deadly Ebola virus.
Yoshihiro Kawaoka believes he has created just such a version of the virus, by taking out a gene that normally allows it to replicate in cells. The hope is that having a a less apocalyptically lethal (i.e. “safe”) version of the virus will allow labs with lower biosecurity levels work on the disease.
According to the BBC: “Not everyone in Ebola research is convinced.” Well thank the great simian in the sky for that! A well-regarded researcher in the field says she would not be comfortable using it until it was thoroughly tested on live monkeys at high doses.
May I also humbly suggest that even if it passes muster, it not be called “safe”, “harmless”, “cuddly” or “cute.”
You may have other suggestions in the comments. Also, I’m not sure if these dudes are “harmless” either. Full BBC story here.
Brittany
In her high school class yearbook, Brittany had been deemed “the most likely to be found dead in a dumpster”, but she had confounded her critics.
First she had joined the circus, where her extensive tattoos and devastating overbite had earned her the title “Brittany the Blighted Beauty of Body Modification.”
As a bona fide freak, Brittany had a certain dignity and gravitas. But she threw it away when she became the long-term courtesan of the Prince of Wales.
Photo credit: Odegaard. | Voted most likely to cause you to shoot milk out your nose
Sunday O-Rama!
Two excellent Carnivals ahoy: The Carnival of the Insanities! Carnivalesque!
There is something just wrong with the ad (to left). Why is the pig slicing himself up? And why does he seem so happy about it? And if you think the self-slicing pig is creepy, wait until you see the other 9 of these 10 Creepiest Old Ads. I have to say, the second ad down (you’ll need to skip the actual ad for “stump the chef”) is more than creepy. It’s kind of prophetic.
The 6 Types of Commenters is an excellent start to the important new field of Blog Comment Theory. Found at an excellent list of things to check out at Best Humor Blogging Links #4. And, of course, you can always find more to read at humor-blogs.com.