Fiction Fridays: Any Port in a Storm
Any Port in a Storm
by Mark A. Rayner
It’s easy to pinpoint the exact moment that it all started to go wildly wrong — the emotional stuff I can’t put a finger on.
Linda and I were sitting in a little pub called The Small Bridge, aptly named for a nearby bridge that spans a cheerful stream as it runs into the Irish village of Tennyra. It is one of those atmospheric pubs you’ll find all over Ireland – ancient dark wooden panels, low ceilings with exposed beams seemingly cut out of the primal Irish forests, and sometimes, sawdust thrown on the floor to soak up spilled Guinness and mud – the kind of place that makes it hard to remember we live in the 21st century. The kind of place you’d never expect to see an American counter-insurgency team.
You sometimes hear about them on the newsvids; they are specialized troops, culled from the other elite American forces units and trained in the use of biomechanical war.
I don’t know what surprised me more: when they burst through the frosted glass of The Small Bridge or when they started decapitating anyone who looked vaguely like they might be tourists. ….read the rest of this story…>
The Carnival of Satire (#63)
Welcome to The Carnival of Satire at The Skwib. We have a fine selection of satire this week, ranging from social etiquette, to politics, to nose-picking. (Though some may argue those last two are the same thing.) We hope you enjoy all the gold-lassoed fun.
Birdman has advice for How to be The Most Annoying Moviegoer in the Theater.
Ahistoricality has discovered breaking news (in bold colors and delivered in speech bubbles): Wonder Woman Runs for President.
Madeleine Begun Kane has terse verse on the question of Jenna Bush, Author?
Craig Harper has a tale of spelunking gone bad in Please take your finger out of your nose. Spot the bonus irony in the top ten list at the end of Craig’s post. (It has to do with the number one faux pas, and the origins of the phrase, “faux pas.” This irony may not be immediately obvious if you haven’t ridden the Metro in Paris.)
Jake Danger at Lunatic Wisdom brings us futuristic psychological satire with Theistic Delusionary Disorder: Our Nation’s No. One Mental Health Problem.
Speaking of psychological satire, Jarod Kearney has a politically correct take on Sauron: Dark Lord of Mordor or Motivated “Go-Getter”?
Sean J. Vaughan helps bring us back to terra firm with this presentation at Reason and Rhyme: NASA Plans to Construct Earth Base. Continue Reading →
If this isn’t Steve Allen, you’re stealing my bit
The author of a recently discovered book of Victorian jokes doesn’t have to worry though. And not just because he’s dead.
Dr Anne Featherstone, a lecturer in performance history at the University of Manchester, uncovered the material of a Victorian clown (apparently stand-up comedians actually wore clown gear) is an interesting look into what the Victorians found funny.
According to Dr. Featherstone the Victorians liked clever word-play and punning.
For example:
“Bad husbands are like bad coals – they smoke, they go out, and they don’t keep the pot boiling.”
“What’s the difference between a rowing boat and Joan of Arc? One is made of wood and the other is Maid of Orleans.”
Then there’s this classic:
Tom: Did you hear of that accident today? Three men run over by a railway train?
Ringmaster: Killed?
Tom: No, they were saved by a miracle – the train was going over the bridge and they were going under it.
Nobody’s mentioned the hand-written notes in the margins yet, such as, “this bombed,” and “Gadzooks this caused a giant sucking sound.”
BBC story: Victorian comic’s material
Professor Quippy: Climate change scientists get angry
Climate scientists are clearly tired of taking any crap.
Just listen to the language.
“The smoking gun is definitely lying on the table as we speak,” US scientists Jerry Mahlman said after he reviewed all 1,600 pages of the first segment of a giant four-part report on climate change, to be released by the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change next week.
The report will have an “explosion of new data” on observations of current global warming, said Susan Solomon, a senior scientist for the U.S. National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration.
Smoking gun? Explosions? And that was just in the US. In Europe, the Swedish scientist, Dr. Bjorn Brusc Bannerthorp, said, “stop denying climate change. It makes me angry! ANGRY!!!”
He then turned into a gigantic green mutant and trashed the media conference.
More coverage:
Warming study promises ‘smoking gun’
Moblogday
The Carnival of the Insanities.
Stories in blog form. (Storyblogging carnival.)