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The Lost PowerPoint Slides (War of the Worlds Edition)

By on October 30, 2005 in The Lost PowerPoints

War of the Worlds graphic from 1898Orson Wells and Mercury Theatre present “this just in” (slide 2)

    We interrupt this program to bring you a news bulletin:
  • strange explosions on Mars
  • meteorite landed in Grover’s Mill, New Jersey.

Orson Wells and Mercury Theatre present “this just in” (slide 3)

  • reporter Carl Philips here at landing site
  • large crowd watching Martian rocket ship open up
  • heat rays vaporize people in crowd
  • O the humanity!

Dwayne Lunchbucket, listening to the radio in Schenectady, NY, presents “I’m freakin’ out” (only slide)

  • Martians, Martians!
  • Aiiiiii!

    • [sound of front door slamming after I run out of house, screaming like a little girl]

Orson Wells and Mercury Theatre present “this just in” (slide 7)

  • Martians spraying poison gas
  • US Army can’t stop them
  • total annihilation imminent.

Radio-listening public presents “hey, let’s panic!” (several thousand slides, repeated over and over)

  • is it really Martians?
  • no, must be a mistake, it’s the Germans!
  • The Germans have invaded?
  • Yep, Germans!
  • Aiiiii!

Orson Wells presents “it’s just a play people” (slide 6)

  • once again, we remind you that this is just a play
  • a performance by The Mercury Theater
  • I am boy genius, Orson Wells, and we will serve no drama before its time.

Inspired by:
Anniversary of original radio broadcast of The War of the Worlds, October 30, 1938

The Lost PowerPoint Slides (Statue of Liberty Edition)

By on October 28, 2005 in The Lost PowerPoints

Statue of libertyU.S. President Grover Cleveland Dedicates “Liberty Enlightening the World” on October 28, 1886 (slide 2)

    • gift from France, another sister in liberty, celebrating the centenary of the Declaration of Independence
    • without France, America would not have been free
    • an alliance of friendship and respect
    • yep, America will never forget this. We’ll always be friends.

    French sculptor Frederic Auguste Bartholdi presents ideas for statue in 1867 (slide 6)

    • liberty is a big idea, therefore, big statue
    • a new colossus
    • needs a hot model (not wife)

    Slides from Emma Lazarus poem “The New Colossus” in 1883 (second last slide)

    Give me:

    • tired
    • poor
    • huddled masses yearning to breathe free

    Also:

    • wretched refuse
    • homeless, tempest-tossed.

    Taylor finds ruined statue half-buried on beach and presents scenery chewing rant number three (only slide)

    • You maniacs! You blew it up!
    • Damn you! God damn you all to hell!

    Inspired by:
    anniversary of dedication | original photo by bencwright

    Carnival of Satire #6

    By on October 27, 2005 in Carnival of Satire

    Carnival of Satire #6 -- image of gorilla smokingWelcome to the sixth Carnival of Satire at The Skwib. We’d like to congratulate TAN-Man at The Assimilated Negro for winning the first Exploding Skwib Award, which means we really liked his post, If We Bring Back The Slave Days, Look At The Cool Products We’ll Have!! A copy of The Amadeus Net is, as you read this, on its way to our newest Swift.

    Onto this week’s satire:

    We don’t know much about Cabarrus County, North Carolina, but we think that Justin Thibault at The View From The Cheap Seats might be onto something big with his Proposal for a New Caucus System: Cabarrus Idol.

    Kid Various at The Idiom examines the issue of gorilla endorsements in Get Your Stinkin’ Paws Off Me You Damn, Dirty Ape!

    Buckley F. Williams at The Nose On Your Face discovers some disturbing things about the crimes that Hussein is being charged with in Accepting Unlicensed U.S. Military A** Whupping Tops New Hussein Charges. Thag is particularly worried about the “spelunking while intoxicated” law. He really enjoys being blotto in the grotto.

    Tommy at Striving For Average produces a category one bit of satire in Paper Towels

    Pluto’s Dad at Pluto’s Page discovers there is hope for all the unmarried North American losers out there in Trouble Finding a Wife? Check out Chechnya! Continue Reading →

    Tuesday o-rama!

    By on October 25, 2005 in General Skwib

    The most recent Storyblogging Carnival is up at Back of the Envelope. There are some nifty short stories there, including the Sad Story of Princess Helga. (I have a weakness for fairy tales, though I think the tale may be mis-titled.)

    The Carnival of Liberty is also available now at Eric’s Grumbles Before the Grave.

    And it wouldn’t be an O-Rama, if we didn’t feature something else, so here is where you can learn to build your own Dalek. Totally pointless, though I know James will like it.